Monday, September 28, 2009

more punk than punk... "live baby live"



After this he started screaming. It was pretty phenomenal. Hypnotic blend of psychedelia, punk, and what I assume is traditional Japanese sound. I don't recall his name.

I suppose I made a conscious decision recently to become fascinated with the world, sort of reacquaint myself with the concept of daily joy inside the pursuit of strange or beautiful things, to touch, to look at, walk through, open, poke, prod, adore. Because of this, even though I don't sit and think about it much, I have become more open to my surroundings and new experiences. One might think that simply the fact that I am off in a "foreign" land, I am going to be inherently more apt to adventuring and explorerating, but not so. Ruts can be had anywhere. Old habits creep up on you. But I think if you kind of stay with the music, just keep listening, you break out of them, find your thinking's been uptight, and changes in the weather can be both outward reflections of the desire to alter the tempo, as well as catalysts for change.

I wrote a song today, which I haven't done in quite a while. And last night, walking home from Lalinda's bar with the Brit, I made a startling confession... that is, it was somewhat startling to him, but infinitely more so to me. It was a feeling about life, something important, among the most visceral and frightening and amazing things that people experience, and of course I'm not going to tell you what it was (and no, I'm not homosexual). But I knew I was onto something when, after I expressed the thought, I didn't doubt it for a moment. Just before, I'd been filled with it, doubt, and just hearing the words come out, something seemed to slide into place. As they say, the truth shall set you free. I am unconcerned. Certain. Phenomenally happy to know something about myself that I'd been denying.... Tantalizing, i'nit?

5 comments:

Rainey said...

very very curious now.

Laura said...

Seems to me that this is like "much to discuss" aka "not much, just hangin... bought a new shirt last week." ?? I'm suspicious. When my computer cools down, I'll skype you and we can talk all about our new shirts.

Alan Collier said...

that's a good possibility with a very high probability, Laura... I do cry wolf from time to time. I'll say this: I'm not a changed man or anything, but there definitely was a moment.

Alan Collier said...

and I did buy a couple of new shirts on monday

Laura said...

I bought a new sweater vest for Aidan, so we'll have to compare notes.

p.s. I would like that frog from the picture post a couple up. My birthday is 12/20, so if you could send him (alive) with a terrarium I would appreciate it.